Story Month: Day 1: Grumpus Rex

Grumpus Rex was a grumpy dinosaur. He was grumpy because the future soldiers were always stealing his berries. One day, Grumpus decided to take matters into his own hands. He hired a hitman to take down the future soldiers with invisible coconut bombs. Unfortunately, the future soldiers greatly outnumbered the hitman and he was consumed by the future. He was magically transported through time and space to the year 1945. The future was a cold and scary place. Mostly because he had been transported to 1945 Siberia. Unable to escape and baffled by the newfangled technology such as wheels, he died a lonely death in the frigid wastelands.

Upset that his hitman did not return, Grumpus hired a super hitman with batwings and laser toes. The new super hitman flew to the future soldiers with great speed. He landed in the middle of their camp and proclaimed:

I am Super Hitman! My might is mighty. My name known throughout the land. For whoever tastes the sweet juicy justice of sweet victory shall forever live in the infernal house of usher! Let it be known that I am, I will, and I do what I must to protect the maintained of order. The day that I fail shall be the day the the darkness of the night consumes the day and the planets align as if to say 'Super Hitman has died. Time shall cease and thought provoking challenges will encompass the the remainder of your days.' Such a fate is sad and lonely. Should you wish it upon yourselves, I can deliver it to you, but only if you known the consequences of the doomed earth. Such matters are at stake for us all and you would be the ones to know the grave circumstances at hand. My friend and eternal brother in arms is displeased by the behavior you have displayed toward him. Should you continue, the aforementioned circumstances may come to fruition, enabling the blinding dread of your darkest fears. The days of pity and suffering shall consume your salvation and the future of yours will become bleak and blood red with the wine of victory and defeat. I am here to stop this madness, and am willing to finish things peacefully, but only if you cooperate. Should rebellion or displeasure come to pass I will make these days your last. The suffering shall be absolute. You will never feel again as you have before. I simply come to you asking for a favor and a treaty of friendship. Leave this place and never return. Deliver yourselves from the wickedness of your ancestors as they, too, have plagued this place for eons and I have deemed the time to be over for you. I shall warn you that, being Super Hitman, I do not take no for an answer. Now you shall leave and undo the wrongs of your pasts. All your pasts. For you can be the men you were meant to be. You can live to your full potential. You have the power to change the world if only you do what is right. I beg- no, I implore you to drop you arms and make peace with the ghost of your past for you will and you must if you wish to live this life which you have been given. For you see, life is a gift worth living and to waste it is to spit in the face of God himself in rebellion. You shall be struck down with the mighty power of infinity! You are not men, you are mice! For only mice would behave as you do, sitting around like you know not of what I speak! Those glazed looks are all the proof I need that I must smite you and erase such smudges from the perfection of the world. Now, what say you!?

Their heads exploded from utter bewilderment. "Works every time," said Super Hitman.
Grumpus Rex lived out the rest of his days happily. He later legally changed his name to "Gladus Rex."